Lifestyle / Motivation


There is a connection between self-esteem and validation. Validation boosts your self-esteem. When people validate your personality, talents, efforts, results etc., it heightens your sense of usefulness and increases your self-esteem.
However, when you fall out with folks, they can intentionally denigrate you and withdraw their validation, just to make you feel less than you really are. There are those who believe that they can make and unmake you. Hence, when your relationship with them hits the rock, they do everything in their power to pull you down.
It is suicidal to build self-esteem dependent solely on external validation. You can lose that self-esteem any day the validator withdraws that validation.
Let your most reliable validation come from you because when the chips are down, you will need all this personal validation you can give yourself. This also makes you unpredictable. When they feel you are downed for good, then you rise up regenerated like a phoenix.

Move away from peoples opinion about you or the things you do. ”what will people say…oh my God! what will my village people think” etc… Truthfully? Why exactly will you live according to the dictate of others who will move on when something bad happens to you? You think they really care so much when all they are doing is scout for the new happening gist to maul over for a week before they move on to another juicy story? Take charge of your life and just live. You know what to do. Kill that helplessness this year, please. This is your life you might as well live it with style and joy all by yourself. On your own terms. 

Determine not to focus on the negatives around you but learn to speak life to your circumstances, situation and challenges. Also devote your strength bringing to reality positive thoughts that feed your spirit, your soul and your mind.

Your personal validation is your secret weapon, put it to use. There is power inside of you readily available to help you overcome any pains and tribulation.



  • Ladies of Delight
    April 6, 2018 at 1:32 pm

    Let your most reliable validation come from you alone🙌🙌🙌 Thumbs up girl

  • Victoria Oyedepo
    April 6, 2018 at 1:46 pm

    Yes dear, it has to come from you alone. Thank you

  • Lustre
    April 6, 2018 at 2:15 pm

    Nice one.

  • Victoria Oyedepo
    April 6, 2018 at 5:51 pm

    Thank you joshua😍

  • Unknown
    May 9, 2018 at 10:15 am

    I couldn't agree more. This is even more true with the advent of social media. We all seek external validation one way or the other…it is human nature. Social media platforms know this so they capitalise on this. But like you said, it is suicidal to build self esteem solely dependent on external validation.

    Yet another beautiful piece Victoria.


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